travel

I’m Not There Yet & That’s Okay

People say that in your 20s, it’s your prime time to “find yourself” and “discover who you are” because “these are the best years of your life.” Wow, I may have overused the quotation marks just a tad there but that was probably to mask the nauseating feeling I get whenever I hear the words “find yourself.”

As I veer into my “late” 20s, it is apparent I have hit the stage where large life changes are happening around me. I’ve experienced a few of them as well. But many of them I haven’t and you know what? That’s okay.

I’ve had many discussions with friends of mine about the rush for getting married, having kids, buying a house, getting the dream position at your dream job, travelling the world, and having life figured out before the age of 30. That’s bullshit. Life isn’t a race. Yet we’re forced into this snow globe where we make our lives look so pretty on the outside and meanwhile we’re trapped in a bubble of self-comparison to others’ and where they are in life.

Allow me to self-reflect:

  • I’m 26 turning 27 in a few months
  • I’m not engaged
  • I don’t have kids
  • I’m not even remotely thinking of having kids
  • I am still paying off OSAP
  • I’m still paying off my car
  • I’m still in school
  • I recently obtained my master’s degree
  • I am still very early in my career, but am blessed to be working in the field I want to be working in
  • I have an amazing partner (now roommate)
  • I do not [entirely] love my body in its current form
  • I have some good habits (i.e. meditation, yoga)

It’s so much easier said than done to say “I’m not going to care what others think of me” or “I don’t care that I’m not as far in life as other people” but how can we not fall into the traps of self-comparison when social media has taken over our lives? It seems like everyone is trying to “one-up” each other by having a bigger, better wedding, or posting the better selfie, or posting how wonderful their lives are because they are part of some pyramid-scheme business (probably) and making “so much money” before the age of 30. Meanwhile, my life feels incredibly uneventful because I’m being unapologetically selfish about having to work and do school because I am one of the few people in any of my friend circles still in school.

In the list above, the things I don’t have yet or have not done yet are not things I’m bothered by. And I am proud of myself for being able to say that. I’m not in a rush for things to happen. I have been working so hard on different aspects of my life and have done so in private. I’m not ashamed of where I am in life. And I am SO incredibly happy for my friends and family who ARE at different stages of life. It’s a messy time. Everyone is doing his or her own thing, and I honestly think that is so awesome. I think we need to support each other for what they are doing or where they are.

I found this picture on Instagram a while ago, and I think it sums it up what this rambling post hasn’t said yet: the definition of “behind in life” is subjective and the “timetable of life” is really individualized.

As my dad always used to tell me (from one overly anxious individual to another), “don’t worry about the things you can’t control.” I’m choosing to enjoy every moment of every day instead of rushing towards “the next big thing.” The things I can control, I’m working on them. I’m happy for others and where they are in life and am open to listen if they are unhappy. I’m happy where I am and where life is going. There will always be something where I will say “I’m not there yet” and it really is okay. 69603287_667367610428598_8774124848604512256_n.jpg

 

Three New Places I Discovered in Montreal

When I was little, I used to go to Montreal once or twice a year, sometimes more. Several members of my mom’s side of the family lives there so I have seen many of the wonderful sights Montreal has to offer.

A couple weeks ago, I went to Montreal for a conference. While there, I stayed with family, visited friends, and took some time alone to explore the city. It is such a beautiful place.

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During my stay, I found three new places I have never been to that I absolutely MUST recommend.

  1. Tommy 

Tommy is a café located in Old Montreal just a few steps away from Notre Dame Basilica. Its multi-level establishment has plenty of room to find a cozy spot to enjoy a coffee, pull out your laptop, read a book, or just sit and stare at the beautiful architecture (all of which I did). I tried an iced coffee and caramel cocoa vegan ice cream and it was perfect for the hot summer day that it was. I wanted to try the avocado toast with smoked salmon on top but I had just finished a meal and couldn’t quite stomach a snack that big. However, a lady at a table nearby ordered it and it looked so delicious.IMG_20180708_225156_588.jpg

2. Muru Crêpe

What an adorable and very delicious brunch spot! Water was served in a glass wine bottle. The caramel macchiato I ordered was picture perfect and tasted just as good as it looked.20180629_101712.jpg

I sat by the window so I could watch the busy street action and before I knew it, my food arrived very quickly. I wish I tried their crème brûlée crêpe because the picture looked scrumptious but I was not disappointed with my choice. I can’t quite remember what it was called but I can tell you it had chicken, thin sliced potatoes, mushrooms, and cheese in a delicious sauce. I devoured the entire thing, it was so good. Will definitely be returning on my next visit to Montreal.

Instagram: @murucrepe

3. Ca Lem 

Ca Lem is the perfect hole-in-the-wall ice cream shop I could ever ask for. Its bright colours of the building and delicious flavours are worth the visit. You can sample flavours if you are undecided (I know I was). They feature two new flavours each week for their Swirl Cones. This was my pick and the flavours when I visited were lemon and raspberry. It was the perfect combination for a hot day. IMG_20180629_151737.jpg

As if their ice cream wasn’t already picture perfect, inside they have a wall with different backgrounds you can use for that like-worthy instagram shot. How cute is that!20180629_152344.jpg

Instagram: @calemcreamery

Honourable Mention: Orange Julep

Gibeau Orange Julep is not a new place to me so I couldn’t add it to the list but it is so good, I had to rave about it. It’s a great place to stop in and get a hot dog and, of course, a famous Orange Julep drink which they also serve as a frappe! Want to know about Gibeau’s Orange Julep? Here’s a link from Mtl Blog about the history of this iconic treasure: https://www.mtlblog.com/lifestyle/the-real-story-behind-montreals-orange-julep

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What’s your favourite place to visit in Montreal?

Hitting the Reset Button – Cuba 2018

I have been absent for what feels like a long time as my thesis draft deadline approached sooner than I anticipated then a few days later, I was on a plane to Cuba.

I am back and I am starting this Motivation Monday off on the right foot.

Going to Cuba for a week was like pushing a reset button. My stress and anxiety had been slowly approaching peak levels but I escaped just in time. We were away for a full seven days. For four of those days, I completely unplugged. No phone use (except for occasionally using it as a clock) including no emails, no social media, nothing. I, along with other individuals my age, have become increasingly dependent on my phone. I use it for work constantly – we have apps for communication, scheduling, and timesheets. I use it for emails and texting and social media use. Not having access to these things was refreshing. Yet I come back, and I look through my photos and wonder which one will I post on instagram.

You would think I would’ve done a better job of embracing the lack of social media when returning but I think that will be a goal for May – to use social media less.

I am happy to have returned back home and have the weather be sunny and warmer than it was when I left it. I can’t wait to go on my evening or early morning walks (we’ll see how ambitious I get).

I hope you did some sort of self-care in the past week. We all need it. Have a wonderful week!

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