self care

Whole 30 Day 20

How I’m Feeling

TEN. DAYS. LEFT. Not that I’m excited to be done or anything but I am starting to reach the point where I’m a bit over the whole thing. I’m so close to being done – but not quite there. My energy levels continue to be great. My digestion is better than ever. I’m learning day by day that more and more of my favourite things have non-compliant ingredients in them and I have had the inner strength to say “no thank you” even if I really want it. Thankfully, the people in my life have been nothing but supportive and when I have been over at other people’s houses, they have had compliant options for me for meals and have been open to me bringing my own oil and salad dressing options. I am so grateful ❤️

What I Ate

Breakfast: I had two eggs (surprise) with turkey breast.

Lunch: salad with roast chicken, a hard boiled egg (cut up on the salad), and some olives. I used my dump ranch as the dressing.

Dinner: Roast beef with roasted potatoes and sweet potatoes, carrots, onions, and green beans. Dessert was a fruit salad.

I’m currently packing my lunch for tomorrow. I made some cauliflower rice for the week and have chicken (made with coconut milk) in the fridge to use up. I forgot I didn’t have any veggies prepped so I am making some Brussel sprouts in the oven using roughly this recipe. Whole 30 Changes: I used Whole 30 compliant bacon and dump ranch and did not add parmesan cheese. I’ll let you know tomorrow how it turns out!

An Anxious Minute

Inhale…

I am trapped in my mind and sometimes, I don’t know how to escape it.

A rolling script plays in my mind with all of the items on my to-do list. The anxious side of my brain is screaming. “You have to get them done! What are you doing sitting around?” The depressed side of my brain lacks motivation and drive and I sit still and lifeless. The response effort just to type this post is almost unbearably too high.

Two minutes ago, I was asked, “how are you?” Without hesitation, I responded, “Good, thanks, how are you?”

I’m not good. Why is it so easy to lie like that? Putting up a fake front to others is so easy for me. Almost too easy. If I go too long putting on the fake, happy front, I literally feel exhausted afterwards.

Exhale.

I forget to breathe sometimes. Steady breaths. I haven’t been to therapy in about a year. I was tired of paying someone to teach me techniques I could learn from Pinterest posts.

Inhale.

Five things I see: a door, the tv, my boots, my phone, my thumbs typing this post.

Exhale. It’s not working. What a stupid exercise.

Inhale.

How many other people around me are pretending to be someone they’re not?

Exhale.

My current heart rate has decreased from 104 to 88. I have turned on the Relax function on my FitBit.

Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.

This will pass, I tell myself. This will pass.

It’s just an anxious minute.

Let’s Talk About Self-Care

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Dr. Seuss once said, “Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.”

And isn’t that the truth? After all, you are the only you that exists. Yet sometimes in the craziness of life, we are so busy taking care of others around us that we don’t take the time to take care of ourselves. In recent years, I have started to take the time and do things to take care of myself and what a difference it has made!

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